Choices and Desires

Paul's soul was as a ship, between two winds, tossed up and down, and as iron between two loadstones, drawn first one way, then another; the one loadstone was his own good, to be in heaven; the other was the good of God's people, to abide still in the flesh. Observe that the servants of God are oftentimes in great straits. Some things are so exceedingly bad that, without any deliberation or delay at all, we ought presently to abominate them, as Satan's temptations to sin, to distrust, and despair. Some things also are so good that we should immediately cleave unto them, as matters of religion and piety. There should be no delay in these holy businesses. Deliberation here, argues weakness. Some things, however, are of an ambiguous and doubtful nature, requiring our best consideration. Such was Paul's strait in this place. He had reasons swaying him on both sides; and such is the happy estate of a Christian, that whatever he had chosen would have been well for him.
(1) Paul's desire was spiritual, not after happiness, so much as holiness. His desire of death was to be freed from the body of sin (Rom. 7:24), more than to be taken out of the flesh; and his desire of holiness, to have Christ's image stamped on his soul, was more than of eternal happiness.
(2) This desire came from a taste of sweetness in communion with Christ.
(3) It was a constant desire. He does not say, ‘I have a feeling,' but, 'I desire,' and that carried him to a love of Christ and his members.
(4) It was efficacious, not a mere inclination, but a strong desire, carrying him even through death itself to Christ. Desires thus qualified are blessed desires. As where we see vapours arise, there are springs usually below them, so where these desires are, there is always a spring of grace in that soul. Nothing characterizes a Christian so much as holy and blessed desires.

Devotional Readings taken from Puritan Richard Sibbes 'Refreshment for the Soul.'
Christ is Best, pp. 3-7
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